On Finding Me Again
Today is a big day! After being in a blogging hiatus for a little over two months, I finally decided it’s time to start finishing all the half written posts I collected and actually hit the publish button. After all, I owe you the reason/reasons why I became M-I-A (missing in action).
So, what kept me from writing?
For starters, I confess that I started 2018 on a shaky ground.
Yes, I wrote a rough plan and my 5 goals for the year. I even went further and jot down specific ways to reach them. During my days as a trainer, the plan and goals I made were detailed and feasible enough to be accomplished.
But something very important was missing though. My heart was simply NOT into it.
I was struggling to focus on anything.
I feel lost and inadequate especially when I see how happy some of the others appear to be.
Oh, and all those “How I Made It, You Can Do What I Did,” things online didn’t help at all. In fact, it just added more chaos in my inbox. I even lost countless productive hours listening to videos which at the end asked me to buy a course or book.
I am not going to sugarcoat it. Those feelings were killing me each day.
Then, I was in a car accident last March. While I thank God that nothing really serious happened — the neck and back pains from it not only drives me insane but required 3 hours of physical therapy visits every week.
What I am doing about it?
“Remember to take care of yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
By the second half of June, I finally took that phrase to heart. Instead of pushing myself to do what others think I should do, I stopped and did my best to find me — the REAL ME.
Then, I made peace with myself.
No more compromising my own feelings. I gave myself permission to do what my heart is telling me. I’m allowing myself to work at my own pace.
For it is only when I am true to what I am, I can start to focus on what I want and I can see what I am capable of. That’s when my true happiness comes out.